I see Guns and urine bag carrying patients walk by me all the time....and it's just a normal day at work for me


Posted to Tan Tock Seng Hospital today. Tommorrow it's gonna be the Ministry of Home Affairs. Seriously, working at Five Loaves bread company gets me to weird places. Places where I've been posted to were (in no random order): Kadang Kerbau Hospital, Minstry of Manpower Building, Change Alley, Seagate and DSTA building where all the NS greenman go for their National Service Enlistment. Listing these made me realized these are either sickly places or government buildings except for Change Alley and Seagate. Not very advisable places. It's either I get myself caught on some deadly epidemic or be right on target for potential terrorist activity.
I dodge from pillar to pillar whenever someone near cough/sneeze in the hospital. It might just be a harmless clearing of throat or soothing a tickled nose, but once in a hospital, any of these act is deemed get the hell outta the way! for me.

That's for the hospitals.

Getting to the government buildings involves quite intimidating, solemn and 'time to look innocent' episodes. These take on, talking to grim-faced soldiers with rifles slung around their shoulders dangling dangerously in between the two of us. What if the damned thing accidentally discharge itself?! That worry itself takes away the sorry state you feel while you try to explain why you should be let in: Cos your there selling healthy bread to promote healthy eating and living. The good Singaporean way. *snicker*
Next, forms are filled with about half your confidential particulars demanded and obediently revealed. Finally you surrender your identity card in exchange for some pass and you walk into gates which has to be buzzed by the security guards which otherwise wont open. And Nobody said a thing about that! I almost crashed the glass door down when it refused to barge at my initial attempt to open it without signalling to the guards. To think that dull-witted security has the cheek to show amusement on his face!

All these just to get them exposed to our Five Loaves healthy bread! I should get "Employee of the Month" Award!


**Note: I shouldnt forget to mention that I'm an English teacher on some days and a bread seller on other weird days. Talk about multiple identity!

You just have to hand it to them the way they make your day


Last Thursday, towards the end of class, a student of mine whom I'd like to think had a wonderful time being in my class came up to me before he makes his way out:


Teacher, will you be teaching us again tomorrow?


I'll have to see what the office says, whether they need me down for tomorrow


*Puzzled looked in his eyes,stones abit...*


Ok teacher, I'll see you tomorrow

The music I make while I'm cruising

I'm that bitch behind the wheels. You know, those type that interprets the indicator as a signal to accelerate. Upon seeing the car ahead flash its signal with intentions of filtering into my lane will have me pump down hard on my gas, eliminating any chance of cutting in front of me. My motto: Wanna get in? Smell my smoke.

Today, I tasted this evil medicine. This bloke drove as fast alongside as me, refusing to let me filter in. He's bent on me cutting behind him instead of in front of his vehicle. In what seemed like forever, my mom told me what I already knew but am stubbornly changllenging against :' he's not gonna give way to you, u'll have to go in behind'.

The familiarity of these stings. Its one thing to do it to others, it's sucky having to experience it.

The devil in me must be driving today, I decided on driving close by this idiot bloke whom I'll call dumbass. By staying close to dumbass, there'll bound to be opportunity of revenge or something similiar. I didnt have to wait long. Dumbass drove slightly ahead on the lane beside me, saw the road ahead blocked by stationary cars and tried to enter my lane. Not a chance. I was accelerating in an attempt to get alongside dumbass the moment I saw those stationary cars. I knew he would try cutting into my lane and no way in hell would I let him do that. Dumbass swerve towards my lane and he could have gotten in had I ease up on my gas. But I was pumping hard remember. And as I sped, I blared my horn making him swerve back in panic. Sweet Revenge

Mom saw through my evil plot. "Your just like your dad!"

My dad's another devil behind the wheels. Pedestrians at traffic crossing sees his vehicle a distance away, does illegal crossing even though the lights are against their favour wouldnt expect my dad to suddenly speed down on them blaring his horn away. They ran of course.

So you see mom, it's really quite a nice feeling. You should try it sometime.

Being nice really takes a lot outta you

I was at my once-a-week work today doing my bit for the five loaves bread company. This lady really sickens my day. She comes up grudgingly as if I pointed a pistol at her, peers at my wares with the least interested set of eyes and proceeded to try finish up my sample of mix nuts. The entire container in her hands, she, clearly hogging onto it and the thought of buying any, never once crossed her mind.
Her colleague amused with the outright display of her obsession with my peanuts:" Is it that nice? You getting it?"

"Just eating the sample. It's free anyway"

You would think her admission of her incredible act would prompt some sense of awareness which she's clearly lacking and makes her buy or leave. It was not to be for couple more mins and more nuts.

Another loved the sample of my mixed nuts, bought a pack but not before emptying out the 'almonds' in my "mixed nuts".

"Dont mind, I take some almonds with me, I really love it"

She stands there, all the patience in the world, digging out all the 'almonds' in the container leaving my sample with just regular peanuts and raisins.

I hate them. As I said before, being nice really takes alot. Here, not flaring up or showing my displeasure is being nice. I got home feeling really worn out. The hours were short but the mental frustration left me tired.

male, everything is A~Ok!

*few months back when my friend stanley arrived in singapore*

me: mom, I wont be back for dinner. Taking stanley out cos its his birthday.

mom: That's nice. Have you got enough money? Tell you what, here, take this wad of notes just in case your short of cash. I'll do the sponsoring. (its the twilight zone! those rare occasion my daughter hangs out with a boy! And alone! It must be the moon!)

me: Woah...thanks. ( when money's concerned, mom NEVER takes the initiative to ask, to offer, to give... You would be lucky u got her attention in your first attempt at asking for the *ching ching* Most times, she plays it cool and rather deaf.


*after stanleys gone back*

me: mom, I wont be back for dinner. Meeting the gals for some get-together.

mom: Where's the $50 bucks you borrowed from me some weeks back? (to get your very first office-wear attire you clearly needed for a very good cause, which is, to wear on your very first job interview) Dont count on me forgetting cos I wont. *evil world-domination laughter*

They say 'ask and it shall be given...' this is one thing I sure as hell didnt ask for but was given..how lucky

I swear I must have blown my mucus the weight of my body mass outta my breathing snouts. I know I should have changed my seats in the bus when that kid opposite me coughed funny. repeatedly. You know, those kinds that sounded like there's a whole truckload of phlegm edged on the base of his windpipe just waiting to be expelled. He coughed like he couldnt breathe and tears were filling his eyes. First few coughs twitched my eyebrows: hmmm that cough sounds contagious. Moments later, he lashed out a string of it and I was screaming to myself: Move your butt! Change seats! Go somewhere, anywhere!

Plop! Lady had to make the spot next to me her seat. I was trapped. Too Cool to excuse myself to escape the 'coughing boy's deadly germs and too self-conscious of the risk of getting myself contaminated, to have a peaceful ride. For the rest of the journey, I sat with my face towards the closed window, breathing air between the glass and my mass. Hopefully, somehow his germs wouldnt be able to get themselves within that space of air that I inhale.

These are little things I do to 'protect' myself as I absolutely hate having a cold. Stranger next to me sneezes, I walk away instantly. At times when its a necessity I gotta walk direct into the 'sneeze-path' , I hold my breathe while I cross the spot. Its not enough to hold the breathe, 'you gotta blow out' I was told. So apart from holding it, I puff my mouth up with air to create a pressure so as to avoid any accidental entry of any air molecule with the 'sneeze germ' in it. Laugh at me all you want but statistics proved me right as times where I got myself a cold was low. This time round, my 'ego' got the better of me and I lost. This is me now typing on the keyboard with a tissue plastered onto my nose thanks to the moisture running down my nostrils holding it in place.

So what have we learned today?

We've learned that little survival tricks can be concocted and they do serve their purpose, so come up with some of your own for self-defence. I have two hamsters. I enjoy Shokobutsu body foam. My name is Pappy Lepew. Use this information wisely!

Power of the mind: Explored

mom cooked lunch but all I can fantasize about is burgers and fries burgers and fries and it doesnt help that all she cooked was toufu pieces and green veg. burgers and fries burgers and fries Maybe if I do this enough times they would just turn to burgers and fries...toufu burger and green fries...anyone?

What Kind of Virgin Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla


hmm technically Im a virgin ya...but I dont think Im an idealist. I mean, sex is the ultimate expression of love, isnt it so for the most part of you? The known few who reads this blog will agree with me, no? Dont speak for others, lets just focus on ourselves here, we dont call it sex do we? We dont say to our better half 'lets have sex' , rather its 'let's make love. We refer to 'it' as love-making do we not? I can just see you guys nodding in agreement. Alrite,for those who dont even bother saying it and just get down to the act, you bunch of animals are totally not good examples I can use =). So, as I was saying, if Im guilty of being an idealist for what I feel are the basics to the big 'S', its a fantasy I sure wouldnt wanna wake up from.
If you have any strong feelings towards this, do feel free to comment.

Reason for my Disappearance: The aliens were here and they took me up for those little experiments...

Alrite alrite its been some time since I last blogged and I guess there isnt any entertaining enough reason I could throw up except for the past 2 days had me down at a language centre being a Teacher.

Yep, those who know me have heard my crowing for this 'dream' profession since eternity. Chanced upon an ad seekin relief english teacher at this language centre. Sent in my resume I did and got it for 2 days.

I was assigned two classes to teach. First class: secondary level, made up of teens to young adults. Most were from China who had the ability to understand me when I converse in English but had real diffculty when it comes to communicating in it. I notice they pronouce the 'v' as 'w'. Vanished was wanished. It seemed they couldnt or somehow was afraid? To have the upper teeth have whatsoever contact with the bottom lip in order to mouth the 'v'. I brought that to their attention and demostrated quite a number of times with much exeraggeration just to drive in the point. Towards end of class, my bottom lip felt funny, it was almost as if there were faint teeth imprints on them. On the whole I enjoyed myself thorougly, although it needed some getting used to at first. Walking into a sea of eyes staring at you first thing in the morning was quite nerve-racking. This is like presentation for 3 hours, a 20min break-in between of course, without written scripts and therefore no practise. I felt better as I got into the feel of things and it helped tremendously when they responded to me. I noticed I was more interested in getting to know them then getting into doing the exercise. But work has to be done of course, however, any slightest chance I could start a discussion, I would. Judging from their eagerness to participate, I would like to think they enjoyed it too.

So the first class was smooth. How difficult could the next one be? I thought looking at my time-table. Primary class was next on my schedule. Its weird but they arranged for pri 2 and pri 4 kids to be in the same class. My immediate concern was, how am I gonna spend time with one group while making sure the other group does their work or better yet, behave?

I walked into mandai when I walked in that room. They were EVERYWHERE. All lost in their little world pattering and chattering. I felt safe sitting at my seat watching them. Where was the nice bubble dream I had: Teacher lecturing and tiny small adorable hands shoot up eager to answer questions with cute smiley-u-wanna-pinch faces?
It took them quite a bit of time to register my presence and seeing a new foreign face sitting there, staring at them, may have a surprise-effect on them cos they began to settle down, traces of fear on their face. They were in shock. I was in shock.

For the next 4 hours I was there, it was like Armageddon. I was not in the best of moods having my rosy bubble burst, every little creature wanted my attention everytime, at the same time, I had difficulty hearing the sounds I was making and far left, two boys were kicking at each other's legs. Both very determined and hard-core believers that the other deserved it. I managed to bring it all under control. No sweat. Strong vocals was all you needed and roared I did. Oh well, at least things were calm at intervals before the next roar. When class ended and they march off with their little bags, most bothered to come to me and bid farewell for the day with their "bye bye teacher". Ahhh....those cute-smiley-u-wanna-pinch faces...

Cant get enough of Murphy's Laws? More here:

MURPHY'S LAWS OF COMPUTERS!

For every action, there is an equal and opposite malfunction.

To err is human... to blame your computer for your mistakes is even more human; in fact it is downright natural.

He who laughs last probably made a back-up.

If at first you don't succeed, blame your computer.

A complex system that does not work is invariably found to have evolved from a simpler system that worked just fine.

The number one cause of computer problems is computer solutions.

A computer program will always do what you tell it to do, but rarely what you want it to do.

When computing, whatever happens, behave as though you meant it to happen.

When you get to the point where you really understand your computer, it's probably obsolete.

The first place to look for information is in the section of the manual where you least expect to find it.

When the going gets tough, upgrade.

When you need to send an email quick, that's when the modem won't connect!

Murphey's Law: If anything can go wrong, it will.

Ok, this is frustrating. Im very certain the pictures I put up in my last entry could be displayed last night. Upon checking it out today, Im not pleased with what I saw: No. 3 pic went missing only to be replaced by the red X meaning a broken link. And as I hit 'Refresh' hopping it could be just a technical glitch in the initial display, I found to my terrifying horror, No. 2 pic went 'X' too. I sniff a pattern forming here, u guessed it, I hit 'Refresh' again and viola! No. 1 pic joined the 'X' family! Why am I not surprised.

Someone by the name of lycons left this comment in my last entry:
yahoo's image hosting doesnt work outside yahoo's compound. use this instead.
http://www.esmartmusic.com/
sign up and host ur pics.
cheers*
lycons | Email | 10.21.02 - 2:50 am


Encouraged, I immediately tried to sign up for an account. After keying all the usual data and being really hopeful as I click 'Submit' this is what I get: ERROR 7735: Unable to create account at this time.

You know sometimes you get the feeling: if the irritating item in question ( for my case here it would be esmartmusic.com and yahoo.com ) could personify into a living being, you'll love to slap its face against your punches. Repeatedly.

PS: Who is lycons? And what are you doing up at 2:50am my unknown friend?

Will I get fried for this?

Excerpts...

White_iCe: ww.enoch.per.sg
pappy: enoch? hahaa
White_iCe: wassup with enoch
pappy: tat fella who was taken to heaven
White_iCe: lol
White_iCe: how u know
White_iCe: enoch was the 1st man that God brought up to heaven
pappy: im a christian
pappy: took bible knowledge for my Os wahaha
White_iCe: OMG
pappy: ya moses the second man
pappy: two of them being taken up differntly
White_iCe: OMG
pappy: enoch din die, moses died
White_iCe: THEN WHAT HAPPENED TO U NOW
pappy: to show the two ways of getting to heaven
pappy: wahahahaa
White_iCe: hahaha
pappy: im undercover
White_iCe: undercover??
pappy: acting on instructions from the divine
White_iCe: whoa
pappy: undercover police kinda work
pappy: ya i've got myself a fanciful badge
White_iCe: so have u been talking to Him lately?
pappy: talking?
pappy: mostly its just receiving of instructions
White_iCe: fanciful badge??
pappy: we don get to 'tok' 2 way comm
pappy: will get 'beamed' to death by his glorious brightness
White_iCe: lol
pappy: hmmmm...third way of going to heaven
pappy: pappy gets beamed to death den taken up
White_iCe: lol

*Disclaimer: With all respect, I like to talk crap but it doesnt mean I have none for the Above alrite. Is this an attempt to justify myself to avoid being shot down by faceless sniper or bombed to pieces by extremists...ya I think it is

Bloody Blast

Today Straits Times had 8 pages packed with horrendous pictures and articles of the Bali blast. Few nights ago I saw it on the news. The number of bodies charred, unidentifiable littered the streets of the holiday island. Video footage showed what the island was before as in the eyes of tourists: holiday-makers dancing, partying with drinks in hand, all with smiles on their faces as they looked into the camera. This was contrasted by scences displayed next..flattened buildings, military troops on the rescue pulling bodies out. These bodies are not the usual 'hands by their sides, lying flat on their back with look of peace on their face' , the deceased have limbs frozen at motion-less positions sticking up into the air. This could only mean one thing: totally burnt dried into the resulting form. Nobody looks into the camera, people who ran past the camera had terror in their eyes. What have they witnessd? What have they seen that put those look into their eyes? You know how disturbed you can get when you look at someone's face who've seen things that shook them up. Even though you may not set your eyes on what they've seen, just by looking at their face is enough to spook you. I stare awestruck at all the news I could watch, any news that could give any info or differnt views. Maybe, just maybe knowing that little more could take away this fear thats brewing inside of me. Incidents like these are just plain human suffering, for the victims themselves as well as loved ones.
For those whose hands did these, pray hard for mercy.

Michael. You're most like the ArchAngel of Defense. You like to hit things, and you like naked people, preferably cute naked people. A real down-to-earth angel who likes frogs and is easily distracted by bright, shiny things.

Which ArchAngel are you most like?
brought to you by Quizilla

This your best way to get me to take 'em off?

Right, so Singapore has a 'bras for a cause' movement. Many many days leading up to today, the radio station I've been tuning into were airing commericals persuading, coaxing, mesmerizing (if you consider the number times it was aired within a span of 15mins!) singaporean women or...man if they're feeling generous too, to donate their bras.
There are just a few things that crooks my left eyebrow into a Nike tick each time I hear the commercial: In an attempt to make women unhook, it gives the really 'attracitve' idea that doing so would put Singapore into the guiness world of records. Who needs to be entered into the records and be made history for these?!? It's one thing to be known for the country that produces the most number of gold athletes but for bra donations? Next, one version of the radio-mercial as I would call it has a man going: I'm standing here with a bra on my head. The segment playback as if it was runing on a jammed gramophone for a couple more times: I'm standing here with a bra on my head. I suppose it was for the attention effect but I think its stupid and out of taste. Whats a full grown man doing voicing out that he's standing somewhere with a bra on his head. And it gets worse, finally the ad continues with him repeating his infamous line: I'm standing here with a bra on my head and I dont know whats the cause. Great. He's either a sick man with a serious case of sleep-walking or its just radio-mercials gone real bad.
Lastly, collection points of the lovely brassieres are held right in the heart of town's shopping malls. Now isnt this the perfect spot to show-off the size of my cups or maybe the numbers of holes creepy crawlies have chowed outta my friend's support.

*Note: with all respect this is a good movement as the famous bra company Wacoal donates 50 damn cents to the breast cancer foundation for every bra donated. The above is just a spit at the radio-mercials which makes my coffee real tough to swallow each time I hear them.

Something I chanced upon..

Children's Book Titles that Didn't Make it

1. You Are Different and That's Bad

2. The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables

3. Dad's New Wife Timothy

4. Fun four-letter Words to Know and Share

5. Hammers, Screwdrivers and Scissors: An I-Can-Do-It Book

6. The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking

7. Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her

8. Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence

9. All Dogs Go to Hell

10. The Little Sissy Who Snitched

11. Some Kittens Can Fly.

12. That's it, I'm Putting You Up for Adoption

13. Grandpa Gets a Casket

14. The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator

15. Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia

16. The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy

17. Strangers Have the Best Candy

18. Whining, Kicking and Crying to Get Your Way

19. You Were an Accident

20. Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will

21. Pop! Goes The Hamster...And Other Great Microwave Games

22. The Man in the Moon Is Actually Satan

23. Your Nightmares Are Real

24. Where Would You Like to Be Buried?

25. Eggs, Toilet Paper, and Your School

26. Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?

27. Places Where Mommy and Daddy Hide Neat Things

28. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry

Motherly affair..

I swear the fertility rate at my workplace is high! There are 10 female staff over at the sector where I'm at and ever since I started my work 2 weeks ago I've never met one of the female staff as she's away on maternity leave. Out of the 9 left, 2 are swollen with 1 to be due for delivery anytime soon! I was doing casual talk with her over lunch just this afternoon and I almost freaked out. Oh well, you gotta understand that I'm a fresh graduate, fresh out from uni where all the average kids like myself populate. Suddenly I'm in a room 8 hours everyday surrounded with pregananted mothers-to-be. To me, they are like walking time bomb, nobody knoes when that little fella inside of them decides to make a grand exit. I've seen lots on tv, enough to know once they want out, they mean business! The fact that she is to be due anytime from 'now' (right at that point when she was telling me) to few weeks from 'now' didnt go down very well for me. I literally became jumpy. Anytime now?! What if it was right at that exact moment as we were talking about it? What are we to do? Tell me so I know what to do. Alerted her I must have cos she couldnt talk properly next, stumbled on her words and she laughed at herself blaming me for her nervousness.
I get the strange feeling that mothers-to-be are in a transistional stage. It's like they're 'evolving' into a different breed of human called 'mothers'. I will not be able to comprehend what they are going through or will be made to go through. In a way I feel there's a distance I place between myself and them cos they belong to the 'different kind' , yet I feel a sense of protection owed to them. Keeping a lookout for them so as not to have any distress caused to their puffed up bellies. I await with eagerness the thought that it might strike when she's at the office, what great excitment and we'll all be too excited to get any work done which is good.

In Rome, speak as the Romans do...

As usual, a million and one things to do but nothing too terribly important. Which makes me kinda sad cos if you think about it, whats the value of the 7 stacks of the company's memo I've just photocopied and compiled? Try calling up japanese clinics to enquire about their operating hours so that our jap expats are well taken care of should they run into some kinda freak disaster. Whats the value in that? My mom could do these, maybe even my grandma if she's adventurous. I didnt know Singapore has japanese clinics to begin with, well, today I know. On top of that, the receptionist I got through to was a pure Jap, it didnt occur to me calling jap clinics would connect me to heavily accented japo receptionist as I'm so used to foreign companies with local front-line employees with the ability to speak the foreign language. For her case, its the ability to speak the english lanuage. I must admit, I got a little nervous when she greeted me with a flood of words I couldnt understand. I said : Erm, you speak english? Its incredible she could understand me accurately without needing me to repeat myself for all the enquires I furthur loaded on her. Her tone was one that's eager to serve, not to mention polite as well. Something that amused me furthur was when she said the word twelve. It sounded twelve-ru and I suspect there were many other little 'ru's she cant helped adding behind her words, just this particular twelve that was really thick the 'ru' sounded. Why cant she stop at the 'ff' her mouth makes when she mouth the word 'twelve'? Habit I guess, but it does amuse me =)

Baffled... Just cant figure it out, jaywalkers sees your car coming decides they can outrun your car and makes for it. The strange behviour begins when you actually slow your vehicle down for them (guess you're the one with better sense to know they arent gonna make it if you keep to your speed): realising you've actually made an effort to avoid hitting them damn thing off the road, they adjust their illegal crossing to a much slower pace accordingly. Thus the 'retard' cycle begins. You, braking a little more and them, taking it slower than before, and it goes on... Maybe I'll try a little experiment the next time, let one cycle run its course and than pump hard on my accelerator...my guess is they'll pick up their pace and scurry off like they should the first time!

oh man oh man! they r playing 'More than Words' on the radio! Its the time to drop dead with overwhelmed passion~~~
Realised I didnt do much blogging today except for some generalised entries.
Basically the best of the the day was the supper I had with my dad (yet again!)
We were at Lau Pa Sat. Sat right out in the open. There werent many pple which was fine with me. I have a thing for crowds.
Not long after we were seated, satay and teh tarik were on the table. The skewered meat were saucy and the gravy thick and groovy.
After many nights of supper sessions with my dad I came to realise that its not so much of the food I look forward to. Rather, its the time spent with him. Tonight as he was talking to me I was just looking at him and it dawned on me how much he has aged.
In a weird sort of way, he was there in front of me and I was actually missing him.
I dont pick spots which are near our place to have supper. I made sure I chose eating spots there are quite a distance away when he asks where I would like to go. Nothing beats riding in the car and having the radio on late at night. Our favourite station at that time of the night 90.5. Carpenters and ABBA would be played ever so often.
I've still a long way ahead and thus so much to learn from the man.

A Short Guide to Comparative Religions
--------------------------------------
Taoism: Shit happens.
Buddhism: If shit happens, it's not really shit.
Islam: If shit happens, it's the will of Allah.
Protestantism: Shit happens because you don't work hard enough.
Judaism: Why does this shit always happen to us?
Hinduism: This shit happened before.
Catholicism: Shit happens because you're bad.
Hare Krishna: Shit happens rama rama.
T.V. Evangelism: Send more shit.
Atheism: No shit.
Jehovah's Witness: Knock knock, shit happens.
Hedonism: There's nothing like a good shit happening.
Christian Science: Shit happens in your mind.
Agnosticism: Maybe shit happens, maybe it doesn't.
Existentialism: What is shit anyway?
Stoicism: This shit doesn't bother me.
Rastafarianism: Let's smoke this shit.

ok so its not new but it makes me laugh

When you are on the train/subway.. do you ever bump into people by accident? I feel this is a natural thing: the train moves, sways and stop short sometimes - what can you do? Usually when someone bumps into me, I don't even look up. And then I feel bad when I hear them apologize because I haven't even acknowledged that they exist. Do they feel silly apologizing to someone who hasn't really noticed they exist? Do they think me a bad person? What are my options at that point, though: to suddenly pay attention to the person and nod that it's ok? All I really want to do is read my book and not be bothered. An even more aweful aspect of my personality is that sometimes when I bump into people, I don't apologize. I don't even acknowledge I did it. Sometimes, I'm just not in the mood and I think everyone else should just understand that the bumping is just part of the ride. Am I a bad person?

Donning the regalia was awesome! We looked like lawyers though some say Harry Potter
Went around campus snapping pics eve, haiking and michelle.
Self-proclaimed ourselves F4 cos we were 4 such 'beautfiul' creatures in sch tat time
Undergrads looked at us, staff got out of the way for us. All wif smiles on their faces
Whose time was it?
Our time.

Each time students passed us by
michelle whispered 'haha u suckers!'
this woman is evil
do we share her thoughts?
U bet =)

Did wat i say i wld
pool at Pot Black
kart race wif haiking and tim. Played it like bumper cars. hiaks.
Sue me.

Graduation nite
Vice Chancellor commended us for our efforts
I did it
We did it
Felt like crying
Lived my life out there on my own
3 freak years for tis piece of paper
no parents
lived thru a house break-in.
glass door smashed. vomit on floor. bed flipped over. our house was ruined
lived thru a car break-in
car stereo and batt ripped out, even my gear knob was gone. had a swastika scratched on the bonnet of my suzuki.
my car was crying
Pain

tis is life
im thankful for it
wld like to tink it made me a betta person

dad likes to bring me out for supper. tats when he'll tok abt anyting and everyting. tonite its abt how growth hormones is greatly reduced by aging and lack of sleep. metabolic rate slows down as one age too. u don burn as fast as before and for those fast burners who notice a change like putting on weight faster den b4...its a sign of aging.

sometimes its his view of the world like tat nite when we saw some nasty pple being rude to the waiters. he tells me how waiters don get treated as human beings sometimes. people haf lost their sincerity and love for each other. i enjoy listening to him tok. i learn so much. Likewise i tink he enjoys talking to me like tis. other times he'll be rather quiet. U knoe u can love someone so much juz by how they look at the world? Den dad toks abt grandpa. He always does. i noticed. Dad misses grandpa alot alot. i still remember tat day b4 they close the coffin grandma ran her hands across grandpa's face. It's like gdbye for the last time. i cant forget tat scene. I had to turn away..